uncle lucius
I was recently at the Iowa State Fair, and we went to see a few of the free concerts. First we went and saw Ryan Cabrera (not my choice) – and let me just say, it’s like he and his band read a book called “rock stars for dummies”. I mean, they were just decked out in all the stereotypes. Really trying to look the part. I’m creative and eccentric and groovy and hip … and clearly, my clothes reflect this. Then, later that night, we went to see a band I love, the Nadas. While waiting for their show to begin, I was enjoying the pre-music they were piping through the speakers. Among this fun pre-music was a song called “A Million Ways” by Uncle Lucius (I later discovered thanks to the almighty internet.) Love it. Also, check out this video of the band performing the song … they’re fucking weird-looking dudes. But weird in a very original way. Like you can really see that these are just dudes who dress the way they dress and don’t really put much effort or thought into it. Greatness. Watch and enjoy.
(Also, note the funny faces he makes while singing. This is another reason why I’m not a fan of live music … musicians can’t help but look weird while performing and seeing this will distract me when listening to the song later. “wait for it … there! That’s the part when the singer crossed his eyes, curled his toes, and his mouth went all crooked and huge.”)
Yeppers – no doubt about it. Funky looking. Love it.

Pet Spa
Coming soon to a pet store near you!
Your pet will jump with joy!
Pamper your pet today! They’ll be sure to thank you.
I’m Sting, bitches!
A while back (i.e. 2006) Sting released an album titled “Songs from the Labyrinth” – a classical album in which he and Edin Karamazov performed several of Sting’s old pop songs as well as covers of the madrigal music of John Dowland (1563-1626). Oh yeah, and they’re playing the lute. That’s right, Sting released an album of lute music. Several articles quote Sting as saying the album was a “labor of love.”
Ever think the real reason for this album was a bet between Sting and his buddies – hey guys, I bet I could release an album of lute music and people will still buy it. Because I’m fucking Sting. Loser buys me a rubber duckie!
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Well played, sir.

Talent
Sometimes I just have to accept the fact that many people are way more talented than I am … or have more time on their hands.
let the movie load completely or it might stop/start which completely ruins the effect … oh, and you might want to turn up your volume, it’s a little quiet
Hey that link he said was just below … yeah, I just put in the images myself. No link required!
And now the behind the scenes Making Of …

happy happy happy happy birthday
I have two birthdays crammed together this week – my sister aged a little bit today and a good friend adds another candle tomorrow. In honor of these lovely ladies, I have compiled the following for my two birthday girls:
Now watch me.
Happy Birthday!
disclaimer
I have been informed by interested parties *you know who you are* that I might be a little behind the times on some of the music I share with you all. Well, I’m here to offer this disclaimer:
I do not listen to the radio. I hardly ever listen to new music online. I don’t have TV so I rarely hear songs that way either.
How do I add new music to my playlists then, you might ask. Well, there are times when I will hear a song here and there – on the few TV shows I do watch on Netflix, over a loudspeaker at a store or a mall, when I’m driving in a car with friends who listen to the radio, following suggestions of people who tell me I simply must listen to so-and-so, or listening to suggestions YouTube gives me when looking for songs discovered. By the time these songs to reach my ears, however, they are generally not new and shiny anymore. So if I post a song on here that I am newly enamored with and it happens to be ancient to people who actually live in current society … deal, people.
Also, a side note I would like to share. I am completely in love with the show Bones. A friend kept saying I needed to watch it, I would love it, it was so great, etc. I was like, sure sure, I’ll add that to the long list of TV shows I need to watch but never get around to. Well, I finally got around to it and am now watching the first season on Netflix. I believe they just wrapped up season 5, so I’ve got lots of catching up to do. Which I am more than happy to do. This show is like CSI and The X-Files had a love child. And what a beautiful baby. I get to watch these fantastic people solve crimes with all the grisly details I loved in CSI, and BONUS I now have another show with seasons-long sexual tension between the two main characters. Sweet.
Oh – and it’s got great music … which I now share … whether they’re new or not

No Shirt, No Shoes …
Discussion from a lunch date today with my two favorite ladies:
Why do all those signs say ‘No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service’?
So pant-less asses are okay for the business world. Good to know. The omission in the statement above is like a Get Out of Jail Free card for trashy people everywhere.
These guys are apparently on the ball, then.

the music of Torchwood
I’m only posting this here to hopefully save others from having to scour the internet trying to find songs featured in the BBC show Torchwood, like I had to do. This list is by no means complete, and it doesn’t include score-type music, only featured songs from Seasons 1 and 2. I’ll even post a few of the ones I like for you to listen to. (Note: the show execs are often in the habit of reusing songs, so don’t be surprised if you see a song listed multiple times.)
SEASON 1
1×1 – Everything Changes
“We are the Pipettes” – The Pipettes
“She Moves in Her Own Way” – The Kooks
“Spitting Games” – Snow Patrol
1×2 – Day One
“Saturday Night” – Kaiser Chiefs
“Ooh La La” – Goldfrapp
1×3 – Ghost Machine
“Sing” – Travis
“Can’t Stand Me Now” – The Libertines
“Feeling a Moment” – Feeder
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1×4 – Cyberwoman
“Chocolate” – Snow Patrol
“We’re No Here” – Mogwai
1×5 – Small Worlds
“Better Do Better” – Hard-Fi
“Born to Be a Dancer” – Kaiser Chiefs
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“Ooh La” – The Kooks
1×6 – Countrycide
“Monster” – The Automatic
1×7 – Greeks Bearing Gifts
“Spitting Games” – Snow Patrol
“Sing” – Travis
“Drag” – Placebo
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“Suddenly I See” – K.T. Tunstall
1×8 – They Keep Killing Suzie
“Red is the New Black” – Funeral for a Friend
“Sing” – Travis
“Soley, Soley” – Middle of the Road
“Gorecki” – Lamb
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1×9 – Random Shoes
“Starman” – David Bowie
“Hope There’s Someone” – Antony and the Johnsons
1×10 – Out of Time
“Moonlight Sonata” – Beethoven
“Trouble” – Ray LaMontagne
“I See You Baby” – Groove Armada
“The Good Life” – Tony Bennett
1×11 – Combat
“Over and Over” – Hot Chip
“Assassin” – Muse
1×12 – Captain Jack Harkness
“My Melancholy Baby” – Melissa Moore (made famous by Ella Fitzgerald)
“(There’ll Be Bluebirds Over) The White Cliffs of Dover” – Melissa Moore (made famous by Vera Lynn)
“A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” – Melissa Moore (made famous by Vera Lynn)
1×13 – End of Days
“Begging You” – The Stone Roses
SEASON 2
2×1 – Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
“Release Yo’ Self (Prodigy Remix)” – Method Man
“Mao Tse Tung Said” – Alabama 3
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“I Want You (She’s So Heavy)” – from the Across the Universe soundtrack
“Song 2″ – Blur
2×2 – Sleeper
* couldn’t find anything
2×3 – To the Last Man
“One of These Mornings” – Moby
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“She’s Got You High” – Mumm-Ra
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“Who’s Gonna Find Me” – The Coral
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2×4 – Meat
* I got nothing
2×5 – Adam
“Christiansands” – Tricky
2×6 – Reset
“Feel Good Inc.” – Gorillaz
“Freakin’ Out” – Graham Coxon
2×7 – Dead Man Walking
“Awfully Deep” – Root Manuva
2×8 – A Day in the Death
“Atlas” – Battles
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* this song is more interesting to me because the guy’s actually making those noises … weird to watch in the music video
2×9 – Something Borrowed
“You Do Something to Me” – Paul Weller
“Filthy Gorgeous” – Scissor Sisters
“Tainted Love” – Soft Cell
2×10 – From Out of the Rain
* nada
2×11 – Adrift
“Other Side of the World” – K.T. Tunstall
2×12 – Fragments
* zip
2×13 – Exit Wounds
* more nothing
There … I hope that saves somebody hours of time wasted digging around on tons of other sites looking for some of this info … I’m a little surprised that with the popularity of the show that nobody has made a site that has the songs listed. Sure, there’s the Torchwood Music Project, a so-called informational site where people can discuss/post songs from the show, but wow, does that site suck. If you don’t believe me, check it out and just try and find names of songs from shows. In a reasonable amount of time. I dare you.
bzzz
Ah, MST3K. So wonderful. And now, Rifftrax. Again, wonderful.
Enjoying The Fifth Element with its Rifftrax – best line ever: “that is so gay, I think it circles back around to heterosexual.”
sample for your viewing pleasure
one thing that I really could do without though – damn Disembaudio. Christ that thing is annoying. He’s the “robot” they use to keep your movie and Rifftrax audio synced up. He also randomly joins in with the mockery and fuck, not funny. Just annoying. To the point where I’m almost disappointed that I paid the $2.99 for the track. Can’t believe there’s nowhere online where I can illegally download these things. Damn you Internet for letting me down!
Now, I’ve heard that this track for The Fifth Element isn’t the most amazing one they’ve made, and I can see that. Many of my friends have told me that the best one to watch is The Matrix. Well naturally, anything with Keanu would elicit the best mockery. That’s just a given.
one more reason why Ben Folds is amazing
Now, we all know he’s fantastic. Well, in case you were wavering on that decision, here’s something that can shove you over the fence into a giant squishy pile of Ben Folds greatness. Apparently, there’s this new chat service that I’ve never heard of – Chatroulette – in which you video chat with random strangers. Ben Folds decided to fuck around with Chatroulette during a concert. Hilarity ensues.
Love Me Dead
a new favorite …
addictions are a terrible thing
Man, I have a problem. I am simply incapable of not buying cheap movies. Augh, what is wrong with me? I broke down and bought another 5 today, in addition to the 3 I bought a few days ago … I am now completely out of shelf space for all my movies. Though I must admit, I’m pretty proud of my collection. Proud enough that yes, I’m going to list all my movies on here … because I can. Feel free to judge me based on my movie choices. I’d do the same to you.
2. The Last Unicorn
3. Pan’s Labyrinth
4. I, Robot
5. Mr. and Mrs. Smith
6. The Girl Next Door
7. Master and Commander: Far Side of the Ocean
8. Stripes
9. Confidence
10. Moulin Rouge
11. The Fifth Element
12. Drop Dead Gorgeous
13. White Oleander
14. The Wedding Singer
15. Three to Tango
16. The Neverending Story
17. The Neverending Story II
18. Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil
19. Lost in Space
20. A Mighty Wind
21. IT
22. Little Nicky
23. Heist
24. Superstar
25. To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar
26. National Lampoon’s Van Wilder
27. Dorm Daze
28. Can’t Hardly Wait
29. Orgazmo
30. The New Guy
31. American Dreamz
32. Old School
33. Legally Blonde 2: Red, White, and Blonde
34. Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle
35. Drowning Mona
36. Mystery Men
37. Evolution
38. Saved!
39. Shaun of the Dead
40. Accepted
41. The Beautician and the Beast
42. Love Potion #9
43. Forrest Gump
44. Grey’s Anatomy Season 2
45. Dark Angel Season 1
46. Dark Angel Season 2
47. Anywhere but Here
48. Ever After: A Cinderella Story
49. Sense and Sensibility
50. Finding Neverland
51. Titanic
52. The Wedding Planner
53. Failure to Launch
54. Someone Like You
55. Meet Joe Black
56. Sliding Doors
57. Sweet Home Alabama
58. A League of their Own
59. Jerry McGuire
60. Down With Love
61. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
62. Sabrina
63. Simon Birch
64. Romeo+Juliet
65. 28 Days
66. About a Boy
67. In Her Shoes
68. Under the Tuscan Sun
69. The Secret of Nimh
70. Oliver and Company
71. Ferngully: The Last Rainforest
72. The Dark Crystal
73. The Pagemaster
74. Hope Floats
75. Robin Hood: Men in Tights
76. Basic
77. Lemony Snicket’s Series of Unfortunate Events
78. The Legend of Bagger Vance
79. Peter Pan
80. The Truman Show
81. Election
82. Thirteen
83. The Life of David Gale
84. The Girl with the Pearl Earring
85. Iron Jawed Angels
86. One Hour Photo
87. The Bone Collector
88. Psycho
89. The Mothman Prophecies
90. The Glass House
91. Kalifornia
92. Match Point
93. Red Dragon
94. The Gift
95. The Good Son
96. Stir of Echoes
97. Perfume
98. The X-Files: Fight the Future
99. Wicked
100. Don’t Say a Word
101. Mercury Rising
102. An Unfinished Life
103. The General’s Daughter
104. A River Runs Through It
105. The Saint
106. The Matrix Reloaded
107. The Mexican
108. Sneakers
109. Spy Game
110. The One
111. Snake Eyes
112. The Rocketeer
113. Antitrust
114. Short Circuit
115. The Bourne Identity
116. Waterworld
117. The Gangs of New York
118. Catch Me If You Can
119. Troy
120. Blade
121. Mission: Impossible III
122. Road to Perdition
123. A Knight’s Tale
124. Johnny Mnemonic
125. The Three Musketeers
126. Recruit
127. Light It Up
128. Double Jeopardy
129. The Exorcism of Emily Rose
130. Vanity Fair
131. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
132. The Thirteenth Floor
133. Les Miserables
134. A Midsummer Night’s Dream
135. What Dreams May Come
136. A.I.: Artificial Intelligence
137. Secret Window
138. Quills
139. Finding Forrester
140. The Arrival/The Arrival II
141. The American President
142. Mirrormask
143. Existenz
144. 8MM
145. The Butterfly Effect
146. Girl, Interrupted
147. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
148. Minority Report
149. Borat
150. Mini’s First Time
151. An American Haunting
152. Blast from the Past
153. Sweet November
154. Man in the Iron Mask
156. Transformers
157. What the Deaf Man Heard
158. Willard
159. Stardust
160. Blood and Chocolate
161. Sugar and Spice
162. Steel Magnolias
163. Breakfast at Tiffany’s
164. Mona Lisa Smile
165. South Park: Bigger, Longer, & Uncut
166. X-Men
167. U-571
168. Message in a Bottle
169. The Jackal
170. Heroes Season 1
171. Heroes Season 2
172. Tripping the Rift Season 1
173. Ugly Betty Season 1
174. The X-Files Season 1
176. The Hunt for the Red October
177. Art School Confidential
178. Win a Date With Tad Hamilton!
179. Casino Royale
180. Clue
181. Hotel Rwanda
182. Spanglish
183. Hard Candy
184. Something’s Gotta Give
185. The Aviator
186. Spaceballs
187. American Gangster
188. Elektra
189. American Psycho
190. Intolerable Cruelty
191. The Mask of Zorro
192. Bram Stoker’s Dracula
193. Reservoir Dogs
194. The Thomas Crown Affair
195. A Guy Thing
196. Airplane!
197. Jumpin’ Jack Flash
198. The Cutting Edge
199. Legally Blonde
200. The Ninth Gate
201. The Holiday
202. The Bucket List
203. Legends of the Fall
204. What Women Want
205. Bewitched
206. The Perfect Score
207. American Beauty
208. The Wedding Date
209. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
210. Must Love Dogs
211. Wicker Park
212. The Rundown
213. Almost Famous
214. Twilight (not the vampire one)
215. Lucky You
216. 3000 Miles to Graceland
217. The Ex
218. The Haunting
219. Rain Man
220. Speed
221. Sleepy Hollow
222. A Little Princess
223. Hots Shots!/Hot Shots! Part Deux
224. Red Eye
225. Fur: an Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus
226. The Family Stone
227. Man of the Year
228. Just My Luck
229. The Client
230. The First Wives Club
231. Pay It Forward
232. Finding Nemo
233. The Incredibles
234. Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
235. Because I Said So
236. Cruel Intentions
237. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
238. Fairy Tale: A True Story
239. French Kiss
240. Gattaca
241. Good Will Hunting
242. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
243. Hocus Pocus
244. The Interpreter
245. John Tucker Must Die
246. Last Man Standing
247. One Fine Day
248. Possession
249. Saving Silverman
250. Superman Returns
251. Volver
252. Whatever It Takes
253. Where the Heart Is
254. The Nanny Diaries
255. True Lies
256. Ghostbusters
257. Ghostbusters II
258. The Shawshank Redemption
259. Swordfish
260. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
261. Anastasia
262. Ghost Town
263. The Duchess
264. Ice Age
265. Mystic River
266. Flicka
267. The Mist
268. How to Deal
269. Laws of Attraction
270. Blades of Glory
271. Distrubia
272. Pretty in Pink
273. Dreamgirls
274. Cheaper by the Dozen
275. Before Sunset
276. The Talented Mr. Ripley
277. State and Main
278. The Hours
279. The Blues Brothers
280. Clueless
281. Alpha Dog
282. Animal House
283. Rendition
284. Se7en
285. Edward Scissorhands
286. Thank You For Smoking
287. As Good As It Gets
288. Super Troopers
289. Waitress
290. A Beautiful Mind
291. Music and Lyrics
292. Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
293. Firefly – The Complete Series
294. The Stepford Wives
295. Year of the Dog
296. Chasing Liberty
297. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
298. Fever Pitch
299. Click
300. Rocky Balboa
301. Gothika
302. The Longest Yard
303. Entrapment
304. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
305. Big Daddy
306. Twister
307. Liar Liar
308. Waiting
309. The Addams Family
310. Take the Lead
311. Some Kind of Wonderful
312. I Could Never Be Your Woman
313. Fried Green Tomatoes
314. The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
315. Tortilla Soup
316. Elizabeth
317. The Mask
318. 13 Going on 30
319. Choclat
320. Mansfield Park
321. The Italian Job
322. Rock’n’Rolla
323. The Prince & Me
324. The X-Files: I Want to Believe
325. Casper
326. You’ve Got Mail
327. Mission: Impossible
328. I’m Reed Fish
329. Chaos Theory
330. Purple Violets
331. Broken English
332. Traitor
333. CSI Season 1
334. CSI Season 2
335. CSI Season 3
336. CSI Season 4
337. CSI Season 5
Lord was that not ridiculous? And I just know you read through that entire list … riight. I really just wanted to test the double column html code, and it seems to be working. Jot me a comment if the columns above are looking funky on your screen, much appreciated.
additional tunage
a little more tunage for you … just a gathering of a few random songs I’ve added to my collection lately
Black & Gold – Sam Sparro
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Blizzard Woman Blues – The Daze
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The Scientist – All Angels (Coldplay cover)
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Move You – Anya Marina
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F.E.A.R. - Ian Brown
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Locked Up – Ingrid Michaelson
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Running Up That Hill – Placebo
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On My Own – Vincent Vincent and the Villains
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Naive – The Kooks
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Money Honey – Lady Gaga
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Instantly Gratified – People in Planes
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Time After Time – QuietDrive (Cyndi Lauper cover)
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Everybody – Ingrid Michaelson
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So I just got done watching 17 Again again. Huh. Thanks movie title for making me look like a stuttering moron. Anyway. I had forgotten just how hilarious I find that movie. Yes, it has some dorky parts (I mean, come on. the janitor spirit guide?) But ignoring those retarded bits, I am seriously almost laughing through that entire damn movie. I also forgot about how the movie makes me feel mildly creepy because DAMN is Zac Efron sexy as hell in that movie. Yes, he supposed to be a high schooler. Whatever. Still uber hot. And in real life, I think he’s only a few years younger than me, so I’m not really that pervy after all, right? (Of course I’m right, I mean, it’s not like I’m a middle-aged housewife using the image of Edward Cullen in her head to help her get it on with her schlubby hubby. Thinking Mr. Zacquisha is fucking sexy? So does not even compare.)
I mean, come on …

… pretty.
book to film – Garden Spells, The Sugar Queen

Garden Spells and The Sugar Queen by Sarah Addison Allen
WHAT IS IT
Garden Spells tells the story of a Southern family known as the “odd ones” in their small town of families known for their familial traits and stereotypes. It follows two sisters, one who has lived a steady and uneventful life in her grandmother’s old house in town, living up to her family name; the other who has done everything she could to run away from her family name, leaving home after high school and traveling across the country, engaging in the typical rebellious acts – waitressing in diners, stealing from customers, sleeping with bosses, eventually falling in with an extremely abusive man who gets her pregnant and reduces her life to a tiny existence made up of submission and fear. This sister finally escapes and makes it back home, the last place anybody would look for her, as she hasn’t gone by her real name or told anyone her real past since she left home. The sisters now have to learn to live together again, and of course we’ve got some subplots of romance blossoming for each sister, all edged with the threat of this horrible man finding them.
The Sugar Queen is about a young woman, Josie, who grew up in yet another small town as the daughter of the richest man in town, known by all to have been a terrible child that threw the worst tantrums for no reason. Growing up with this over your head, it doesn’t matter how nice and pleasant you turn out as an adult, in a small town like that, everybody will still see you as that nasty little kid. Josie also has to take care of her aging mother, a beauty that’s loosing her bloom and is disgusted to see that her daughter is growing into her looks … beautiful children are much harder to control than ugly and therefore grateful children. Again, we’re treated to some romance, both for our main character and a few minor characters, as well as some interesting family issues (particularly daddy issues).
Both books have just a hint of whimsy thrown in there to compliment the dramatic elements – a magical apple tree with a strong personality, whose apples show the consumer the biggest event in their life; books that magically appear when needed; etc.
WHY IT WOULD KICK ASS ON THE BIG SCREEN
There’s not a doubt in my mind that the weepy women of the world would just love these movies. We’re talking date-movie here, folks. So not only would the filmmakers get money from the solitary women desperate for a little romance in their lives, but they’d also snag the crowd of women dragging their men into the theaters. Not to mention the DVD sales. This is just the type of movie that most every romance fan would want on her shelves, to pop in to offer a little variety between their Nicholas Sparks movies.
WHY IT’LL NEVER SEE THE INSIDE OF A THEATER
The books didn’t really gather a huge following with their release, so I doubt they’d get noticed in the Hollywood scene. It’s sad how many great book adaptations will never happen simply because they’re never read by those in charge of the filmmaking.
*sigh*, why can’t these people pick up a book now and then? And something not always on the BUY ME BECAUSE THE PUBLIC DEMANDS IT tables in Borders. But then, I guess they’re busy making movies and such. You know, doing they’re jobs and all that.

book to film – The Shades
The Shades by Betsy Brock
WHAT IS IT
A fun children’s book about a boy who goes to visit some distant relative living in a great mansion with a rich history. Upon entering the garden and instantly going for a swim in a giant dolphin fountain, he discovers that the water that falls from the dolphin’s mouth onto one’s eyes enables you to see these shade people … fantastical people created by the shadows of everybody who enters the garden. Of course, nowadays, it’s rare for a new shadow person to be created, the old ones just sort of squish and stretch themselves to fit whatever person they happen to be shadowing. Our young boy gets to know the group of shadows, who have gathered together into a sort of familial unit and call themselves the Shades, and their life there in the garden. And as the plot conflict – an evil man wants to take the dolphin statue and have it replaced with this statue of a woman, that for some reason is evil. The young boy must stop this from happening, mostly on his own of course, since his new friends are insubstantial and therefore slightly less than helpful.
WHY IT WOULD KICK ASS ON THE BIG SCREEN
What little kid wouldn’t love this movie? For that matter, what older kid wouldn’t secretly love this movie while outwardly displaying indifference? It’s just a simple, fun kid’s movie with just the right level of fantasy. Not so much that the kids don’t even buy it, but enough that with a little childish acceptance (of course there are shadow people living in the garden, of course the dolphin fountain is magic) the movie would be true and simple fun.
WHY IT’LL NEVER SEE THE INSIDE OF A THEATER
Yet another case of “nobody’s ever heard of this thing.” I mean, you can’t even find a copy of this book to buy online. I was searching for just a picture of the book cover to put here and I couldn’t even find that. The almighty Google doesn’t seem to have ever even heard of this Betsy Brock character, let alone her little book The Shades.
book to film – The Giver
The Giver by Lois Lowry
WHAT IS IT
Set in a futuristic Utopian society where everything is mediocre and bland, down to the tiniest detail. The people don’t even see colors, that’s how bland shit is. Everyone lives with an assigned family unit (not natural families, of course, all births are created via artificial insemination and the brood of mothers – young women who are assigned to this “career” – and they’re all kept separate) and if a new baby doesn’t seem up to snuff, it’s killed. This is a dark secret, of course, definitely not general knowledge. But even if it were, I doubt anybody would care. Well, within this horribly boring society, there’s one man who acts as the caretaker of memories. He is in charge of remembering things that have long since been eliminated from their society. He’s basically only there for consultation, not repeating history’s mistakes and such. Well, he’s getting old, and we certainly can’t have him dying and releasing those horrible memories into the public. So a young man, as his career assignment, is told he will become the new caretaker. He will receive all the memories from the old man, known now as “The Giver.” Of course, as the process of transferring memories progresses, our young man gains knowledge that makes him begin to question his “perfect” society, especially once he learns that the town leaders happily kill infants that don’t make the cut.
WHY IT WOULD KICK ASS ON THE BIG SCREEN
Movies about future societies are numerous, but this future seems pretty original. The closest I can think of is the emotionless world of Equilibrium. So not only would this be an interesting take on the future, which I’m sure people would enjoy if not only for the “what if” questions it would elicit, but it’s got a nice element of tragedy thrown in there. Everyone would love these characters – the old man burdened by these memories, the boy growing to question the world around him. And in this movie we would get everything from fights for injustice to a awkward, sweet, and frustrating childhood romance to an exciting escape from the town compound and a thrilling flight through the surrounding woods.
WHY IT’LL NEVER SEE THE INSIDE OF A THEATER
Actually, the book’s been adapted for the stage by a children’s theater group in Oregon (Oregon Children’s Theatre) into a one-hour production which premiered in 2006 and has popped up on small, unknown stages across the country but never anywhere with any sort of prestige. In 1994, Bill Cosby and his production company actually got the ball rolling on a motion picture adaptation of The Giver, but over the years, the project has changed hands so many times, sometimes gaining a fairly large following of people willing to actually make the movie, but so far nothing that could be called progress has been made towards actual production since ’94. If you look on IMDb, you can see that this movie is shown with a release date of sometime in 2011, but obscure movies like this are often shown to be in the works and then inevitably fall apart despite the hard evidence on the IMDb page that says it’ll be coming soon to a theater near you. example: The Last Unicorn live action version, The Brazilian Job … RELEASING SOON (read “NEVER”)









